(This in Sean, Mary is the writer in our family so I'll do my best) I am writing this with a heavy heart, as some of you may already know earlier this month I was released from employment from my dream job after 7 months of probation. I was hired as a firefighter/PARAMEDIC but little did I know it was a Paramedic/firefighter that they wanted, I came in to the job without any paramedic experience and was not showing enough improvement in my paramedic assessments so they had to "let me go." I'm sure you may be thinking well that's not too bad or I could just get another job. To put this in prospective I've been training and working towards this job for the last 7 years, 6 years of volunteer work, 6 months on an ambulance, driving all over the state to pick up or drop off apps, over 100 applications filled out 50 or so tests 30 interviews just to name a few of the things. I finally thought I got the one job I could retire at. Just thinking of all the hard work and hours, days spent studying doing all I could to keep this job it was just not enough. This has been one of the hardest time of our life.
My rational side is telling me "it's only a job" but that still doesn't make me feel any better. If you look back a few posts I was finally able to give Mary left her job and started her dream as a stay at home mom. To have two small children and a wife all counting on you, I really don't have time to wallow in this but it is very disheartening. I keep thinking I'm going to wake up and this was all just a bad dream. But life doesn't work like that. and It could have been a lot worse if something had happened to are kids we would have been devastated.
On the positive side I've now have time to pursue my dream of becoming a Male Model I'm working on my blue steel (that Hansel is so hot right now). I'm just kidding, but I can see God using this time to work in my life, it's a good feeling to know that God gave me that job, knowing full well that he was going to take it away and that's a promising thought. I feel I've had a turning point in my relationship with God which makes all this job stuff seam so small. So, pray for us that we can figure out what to do next and that we can find comfort in God's plan and that I could find another job. Finally to any of those who are actually reading this I have to put this out there my wife is amazing!!! She is so supportive through all the changes and her biggest concern is ensuring that I am OK, Mary I would not want to go through this adventure of life with anyone else. I love you so much.
I have lost 2 jobs in my past and I can honestly say it was the worst feeling of my life. I can also say, without hesitation, that thru those experiences I have learned more about God and become closer to God than ever before, and I am grateful for those loses. I came out of each circumstance with a BETTER job and into a BETTER situation for me AND my family. I can testify to God's goodness and provision, and to HIS plan for my life, not mine. We will be praying for you all...for provision, for peace and for eventual understanding. One of my favorite verses is "in all your ways acknowledge HIM, and he will make straight your path" and "seek first HIS kingdom, and all these will be added to you". Matt 6 paraphrase...HE provides for the birds and the flowers, will he not provide for you? As one who has been through it, be encouraged, for HIS timing is PERFECT.
ReplyDeleteThanks for being so real Sean. God indeed is working. All things. For the GOOD of those who love him. We love you guys and are praying hard for you!
ReplyDeleteOh Sean, my heart breaks for you guys. That job seemed to right. And yet God's ways are higher than our ways. Someday I'm sure you'll look back on this and see how it was all part of His plan. Thanks for letting us know, we'll be praying
ReplyDeleteSean & Mary, we will be praying for you at chez Buterbaugh. We know how much this job meant for your family and we know this must be absolutely heartbreaking. Consider the life of Joseph, whose fall from a favored position eventually led to a greater purpose. It is likely the same here.
ReplyDeleteI am so glad to read your perspective Sean. Thank you for sharing...We love you guys and know that God WILL provide for you. We see it in our lives all the time and can attest to His faithfulness to us. We don't know the plan but He does.
ReplyDeleteSean, I don't know you at all but I am so sad for your circumstances that I feel I have to take a moment and say...dude. This bites.
ReplyDeleteYou have worked SO hard to be a good provider and head of house; Mary's obvious immense pride in you has truly been joyful to witness. I know not much I could say will really make this any better, so I will just say that I am praying for the comfort of your family and for the best job EVER, even better than this one, will just be dropped by God into your lap.
You two stick together...in the literal and figurative senses...and do not let fear get a toehold. It will be okay.
Sean & Mary-
ReplyDeleteThanks so much for sharing and trusting those who care about you with your situation. We experienced a very similar situation almost 2 years ago when I lost my job a few months after Kylie was born. We too knew God had a plan and I ended up in a much better job within the month!! We will be praying he will bless you with better employment as well. We love you guys!!!